Onward, Ever Onward

 

     In the fall of 1971, when I was five years old, I had a peculiar experience that changed my life forever. Up until now, only a handful of people have heard this story. One afternoon, in my kindergarten class, I was standing in front of an easel, blissfully splattering tempera paint onto a large sheet of construction paper. Like all the other kids in my class, I focused on creating something from the large blobs of color I was applying to my paper’s surface. I was, as they say nowadays, in the zone. During those moments of complete concentration, I had a vision that I have never forgotten. The blobs of color on my sheet of paper transformed into a scene before my eyes. Suddenly my brush strokes of alizarin crimson and cobalt blue had become the inside of a large, ornate building. I recall standing in silence, taking everything in. The room I was standing in was vast, and large framed paintings adorned its walls. I remember scanning the room slowly from top to bottom and side to side. Suddenly, something caught my eye. In the distance, in one of the large frames, was the painting I had been creating in my classroom. I’m not claiming clairvoyance at the age of five, nor do I claim to have been able to articulate what was occurring at that moment. Still, intuitively, I understood the message behind what I was seeing. I stood there frozen in disbelief as I looked at my work on that enormous wall. There was no question that what I saw that day was my destiny. I have never once doubted what happened that day. I’m damn lucky, and I know it. Not everyone knows what they want to do for the rest of their life at age five.

       My first-grade teacher, whose name I’ve sadly forgotten, confirmed what I already knew when she pulled my mom aside during a parents’ night at school to tell her that her son had real talent that she should nurture and encourage. My mom didn’t miss a beat and began her lifelong support of helping me achieve my goals, including going to art school and becoming a professional. 

     I can’t begin to tell you how much art has helped me over the past five decades and how, in many ways, it has saved me as well. In elementary school, I was your classic nerd kid. Black, thick-rimmed glasses, funky haircut, and insecure as fuck. To make things even worse, I had a noticeable strabismus and struggled with math. All those things made me a prime target for all the tiny assholes in my class. There were days when I felt like I was in hell. The insults, put-downs, and vicious cracks at my expense went on for years. 

     Thankfully, art was always there to help console me; it has never failed me. During those difficult years, I realized that I could do something unique that others couldn’t do. That gave me inner strength. I may have felt great insecurity because of my awkward appearance and weak math skills, but my talent was iron-clad and untouchable. I wasn’t the best at drawing in school – some kids drew better than me, but that didn’t matter. Nothing was going to stop me from developing and refining my talent. That realization, more than any other, sealed my fate. It was the one area where I had total control.

     I come from humble beginnings: I lived in the projects on Section 8 housing in my youth. There, I began to read comics and became exposed to art. Comic books opened up another world for me. Along with their fantastic tales of heroic do-gooders and sinister villains, they also exposed me to the brilliant draftsmanship of Neil Adams and the genius-level imagination of Jack Kirby. Because of that, all I ever wanted to do was draw, draw, draw. You have lots of time to fill when you’re an only child, and nothing does that better than drawing. I may have lived in the projects, but comics lit the flame that continues to burn brightly to this very day. Art not only allowed me to survive those challenging years but also to grow as a person.

     My mom knew no boundaries when it came to supporting my talent. Because of her never-ending efforts, I am the artist I am today. Despite money being tight, she made things happen for me. When I was thirteen, I got my first drawing table. A year later, I had my first formal art classes. My tutor was a local artist named John Sierra. John had a large studio in an industrial area of Fresno where he worked on mural designs. I still remember the large rolls of paper stretched out over the studio’s floors. His work was excellent, and I benefitted greatly from his expertise. He taught me the fundamentals of drawing: basic shapes, shading, and perspective. Those things were eye-opening for me. I continued my education at fifteen via a two-year correspondence course through Art Instruction Schools. Without telling my parents, I replied to the “Draw me'” ad from TV Guide. The next thing you know, there was a rep from the school in our living room, signing me up for a two-year stint. That course expanded my knowledge by teaching me basic color theory, multi-point perspective, and composition. That course aided in my development throughout high school. In 1985, Otis Art Institute of Parsons School of Design accepted me into their illustration program. I was only there for a semester, but my time there left its mark – it instilled a level of excellence that has never left me. Parsons School of Design ranks as one of the world’s best art and design colleges, and I remain fiercely proud of my time there. My art school odyssey continued throughout the late eighties and early nineties in San Francisco. My educational journey finally came to a close in 1992 when I finished my studies at the Academy of Art College, where I majored in illustration. 

     In my formative years, my artist heroes set the bar for me. They also reinforced the belief that I’d had since childhood that I could be great at what I do if I worked hard and long enough. More than any other, that belief has helped me weather all the uncertainties and personal changes that I’ve experienced over the past three decades. To make art, you have to believe in yourself and what you do. To do great work, you have to be willing to play the long game. That requires an unusual amount of patience. There are no shortcuts – either you put in the time at the drawing board or don’t.

     I’ve come a long way since my vision of my future at five and my discovery of art through comic books in the early 1970s; my taste in art and my skill have expanded significantly since then. I have never been ashamed of where I come from and will always be proud of that. However, that does not mean I wanted to stay there either. When you come from a modest background, it pushes you to achieve your goals or kills them. Over the past thirty-five years, I have been through many changes and ups and downs. All through it, I have continued to draw and strive. Onward, ever onward.  

Drawing used in this post

In 1868, Burne-Jones was in the throes of a turbulent affair with Maria Zambaco, his Anglo-Greek muse, and model. During that period, Burne-Jones produced an extraordinary series of pencil drawings of Maria. I based my drawing for this post on one of these drawings. I don’t pretend that my drawing captures the subtlety inherent in EBJ’s brilliant drawing – pencil, pen, and pen and ink are two completely different mediums, each with their unique properties. I wouldn’t consider this a finished piece by any means; it’s a study. Maria Zambaco remains a bit of an enigma to this day. New details about her life have emerged over the past decade, but a lot remains unknown about her. Burne-Jones ended his affair with Maria in 1869. Over the next decade, he became the most celebrated Pre-Raphaelite painter of the late nineteenth century. Maria eventually moved to Paris and continued her artistic career working with people like Aguste Rodin. She died there in 1914.

 

 

 

It’s All About The Work

 

Abstract 1 - February 2016

After a nice long break from blogging, I feel refreshed, energized, and ready to jump back into it. My break was good for me; it allowed me to reconnect with myself and things that are important to me, and it also allowed me to put things into perspective.

So, here I am. Most people who know me well know that I am hugely influenced by both American and European comic book art, especially French bande desinée. I get just as excited by seeing an original Robert Crumb or Dave Stevens as I do by seeing an original Jean Giraud, Philippe Druillet, or Enki Bilal. I love comic book art, but I also love Picasso, Burne-Jones, Lord Frederick Leighton, and Joaquín Sorolla too. As an artist, I must be able to express different things in different ways and still retain my own identity. Doing that is the trickiest thing for any artist to do but, ultimately, you have to deal with it; otherwise you’re doomed to becoming boring and one dimensional. I’m not too impressed with artists who are limited in their outlook — it’s like talking to someone who only talks about one culture or one interest and nothing else. I’m even less impressed with artists who put creativity over craft. The quick, slap-dash style doesn’t mean crap unless you’re a strong and competent draftsman. Trying to be cute and clever is even worse. Learn to draw first, then get creative. People want skill for free today. They don’t want to work for it, they want to acquire it by an act of magic. Get a clue folks. It doesn’t work that way. Bust your ass, master your craft, then come and talk to me about it.  

Retaining your identity despite stylistic changes is one of two huge challenges an artist faces. The second, and more important, is being yourself through and through no matter what. Maturity and experience have taught me that it’s not about what school you went to, or if you’re self taught, or if you have a drop of fame, or if you have a million followers on social media or whatever. It isn’t about any of those things — it’s all about the work. My credo is and always will be Draftsmanship is craftsmanship. If you don’t draw well, then you simply cannot move forward. You can’t break the rules when you don’t know them. It’s all about the work. When I was 19 years old, I was accepted to one of the best art schools in the world and I’m also an ex-student of Barron Storey, an illustrator who’s a noted figure in the history of American illustration and whose students have influenced a generation of comics artists, BUT it’s not about any of that. Someone can brag all they want about what they do, who they know, or where they studied, but that won’t hide anything from a trained and experienced eye. In less eloquent words, at this stage in the game I’m not easily impressed and I can see right through people’s bullshit. If I come off as arrogant because of this, then so be it. I’ve been drawing since the age of five and I’ve been a professional since the age of 25, so it is what it is; take it or leave it. Beautiful, well-crafted work will always take precedence over ego.  

The drawing that adorns this post is something that started as a smaller doodle in my current sketchbook. My love of Picasso’s work is pretty clear here. As I often do, I scanned the page with the doodle on it and posted it to my social media accounts. Not long after I posted my page, Michael Kalman, co-founder of Stallman & Birn sketchbooks (my faves), came along on Twitter and kindly left me a very encouraging comment. His comment inspired me to expand my original doodle idea into a bigger drawing. I feel as comfortable working in this style as I do when I draw a portrait of someone, when I do a comic style drawing in brush and ink, or when I paint in watercolor — it’s the same thing to me; all those things are part who I am. I’m fortunate that I can easily do different things equally well; t’s something that not everyone can do. Switching between different approaches is something that I’ve always been able to do, but not something that I do too often. That is going to change.

In closing I’d like to inform all of my dear readers that I reached an important Twitter milestone a couple of days ago: 500 followers! I’ve been on Twitter for quite some time, but the majority of my new followers have come in the last 2 years – 430 followers in that time. I am so grateful to all the people from around the globe who follow me here and on social media. THANK YOU to each and every one of you for helping me reach the big 5-0-0 on Twitter. I greatly appreciate your continued support.